Why is Hockey called Hockey?

A great internet wander this one. So many variants, even when they say the same things. Best part was the start in Wikipedia. First, from the article Hockey:

the word "hockey" was recorded in 1363 when Edward III of England issued the proclamation: "[m]oreover we ordain that you prohibit under penalty of imprisonment all and sundry from such stone, wood and iron throwing; handball, football, or hockey; coursing and cock-fighting, or other such idle games."

Compare and contrast to the article from Ice Hockey:

The name of hockey itself has no clear origin, though the first known mention of the word 'hockey' in English dates to 1799 in England.

and then further elaborates:

In 1799, William Pierre Le Cocq, in a letter written in Chesham, Buckinghamshire, England, provides the earliest known reference to the word 'hockey': “I must now describe to you the game of Hockey; we have each a stick turning up at the end. We get a bung. There are two sides one of them knocks one way and the other side the other way. If any one of the sides makes the bung reach that end of the churchyard it is victorious.”

So, let us start gathering some other origin stories and etymologies:

1. Answers.com "The etymology of the word hockey is uncertain. It may derive from the Old French word hoquet, shepherd's crook, or from the Middle Dutch word hokkie, meaning shack or doghouse, which in popular use meant goal. "
2. Virtual Museum of Canada However, in the town of Windsor, Nova Scotia, considered one of the birthplaces of the game, a story has long circulated regarding a Colonel Hockey, stationed at the garrison on Fort Edward. The Colonel used the game to keep his troops conditioned, and the game soon adopted his name, as many referred to these workouts as "Hockey's Game." Though there is no official documentation backing either claim, timing lends credence to the Colonel's story. The British Army list, housed in the Library of Nova Scotia's General Assembly in Halifax, lists a John Hockey serving in the mid-1800s when the name of the game was adopted.
3. Word-Origins.com: The first known unequivocal reference to the game of hockey comes in William Holloway’s General Dictionary of Provincialisms 1838, where he calls it hawkey, and describes it as ‘a game played by several boys on each side with sticks, called hawkey-bats, and a ball’ (the term came from West Sussex). It is not known for certain where the word originated, but it is generally assumed to be related in some way to hook, with reference to the hockey stick’s curved end. The Galway Statutes of 1527 refer to the ‘hurling of the little ball with hockie sticks or staves’, which may mean ‘curved sticks’.

But, for a full picture, read Chapter 1 ("The Origins of "Hockey": Behind the Dictionary Definition" by Gerald Owen) in Total Hockey, Second Edition (extensively quoted at PickUpHockey.com). I particularly like how Owen combines threads when he writes:

But yes, the surname could well have been an influence-a pun-like coincidence that may have delighted people if Colonel Hockey himself played, or watched, hurley / bandy / shinty / randy / ricket / wicket / break-shins / hockey.